mindful, compassionate, and occasionally fed up
I spend a lot of time writing about mindfulness, compassion, reflection, and self-awareness.
And I mean every word.
But every now and then, I also want to roll my eyes at something.
I find it comforting to know that some of the kindest, most emotionally intelligent people out there also have another voice within them, the one that occasionally says,
"Oh, come ON."
the two words I didn’t fix in my book
I’m currently in the process of formatting my book. After two and a half years of writing, it’s undergone no fewer than eight revisions, with a few later tweaks here and there.
The subject matter is personal, based on some hard-won lived experience. What started out as therapeutic venting has been channeled into
5 beliefs i had to unlearn while living with chronic pain
Living with chronic pain has changed many things in my life.
What surprised me most wasn't what I learned along the way. It was the many beliefs I had to unlearn.
7 things i started doing between doctor visits to take my power back
Some of the hardest words I heard in the doctor's office weren't "We don't know what's wrong," or even "There's nothing more we can do."
They were: "We'll see you again in three to six months."
And like so many others living with chronic illness or pain, I found myself wondering:
"Okay...but what am I supposed to do until then?"
the harder part of receiving kindness
We’ve all been told it’s better to give than receive, and for many of us, it’s certainly easier.
Over the past couple of weeks, I've found myself on the receiving end of an extraordinary amount of encouragement. Some of it came from familiar places, some from complete strangers. Unexpected generosity. New connections. Small but genuine and
There was supposed to be a video: The Idea i had three days ago
There are so many things I’d love to tell you. Moments of my day I’d really enjoy sharing. Ideas for content that are always running through my mind.
But the truth is, I’m exhausted.
the book you’ll never read
I've written a book, but there's another version of it that you'll never read.
That’s the one written in invisible ink, for my eyes only.
It's filled with paragraphs that never made it onto the page, emotions that never made it into the manuscript, and stories that were intentionally set aside.
The book I’ll publish is the one I believe will help people. The invisible-ink version is the one that brought it into being.
The uniquely perfect space of “almost okay with it”
Recently, I heard someone in a painful situation describe herself as being "almost okay with it."
The phrase stayed with me.
She wasn't talking about something small. She was speaking about a loss so profound that I can barely allow myself to imagine it. Yet what lingered in the air wasn't the story itself. It was those few simple words:
"I'm almost okay with it."
writing the book while still living the story
Over the past many months, I’ve spent countless hours writing and revising a book about living alongside chronic pain. In many ways, the process forced me to revisit this experience more deeply than I had in years. In other ways, it challenged me more than I imagined.
why I don’t use the word “acceptance”
There’s a word that rarely appears in my work.
Not because I don’t understand its meaning.
And not because I think there’s anything inherently wrong with it.
But because, for me, it has always felt a little… unsettled.
The word is acceptance.
I call it… the “A” word.
An Ode composed upon a journey
This is a piece I wrote many years ago and recently revisited. It’s something that still speaks to what I’m exploring now, in a very different chapter of my life. I wrote it before I had language for what I was trying to understand. Revisiting it now, I’m struck by how much of the same thread was already there. I recognized myself in it again.
In praise of the unfiltered moment
Some things are just better in their raw, unfiltered state: rich cacao from the heights of Peru, a shot of espresso first thing in the morning, amber-colored honey from a local hive – or the words of a woman, before she’s had time to “calm down.”
The Job I loved was still just a job
Not everyone can say that they love their job and get incredible fulfillment from it. But for those who do, the effects of chronic pain can make it devastatingly difficult to keep doing that work. I continued to teach for two and a half years in horrific pain while seeking proper medical treatment that could restore my health and ability to function. I had no way of knowing then that this wasn’t in the cards.
when relationships end without explanation
Few experiences are more painful than when someone disappears from our lives without explanation.
There’s no final conversation, no moment of clarity, no shared understanding that something has changed. Instead, there’s simply silence, and the unanswered question that stays with us for a long time afterward: What happened?
When “Just” Isn’t simple
Few words sting quite like just when you’re living with chronic pain. It might sound harmless enough on the surface, yet it carries an assumption that effort, access, and capacity are universal. In this context, it can feel like a four-letter word that cuts to the bone.
Speaking To Our Needs In Relationships
Many people living with chronic pain — or any chronic illness — experience a kind of social isolation that’s difficult to articulate. Sometimes it’s logistical: we don’t feel well enough to socialize. Sometimes it’s emotional: we feel misunderstood, unsupported, or made to feel
the importance of protecting our peace
Peace can seem like a rare enough commodity these days. When chronic pain enters the scene, peace is no longer a utopian luxury to dream of, but something we must decide to create for ourselves. This is our wake-up call, and we can each decide what that will mean for us.
doing less than we are able — on purpose
We live with the cultural and internalized belief that if we can take more on, we should. An extra five minutes? Great – what all can we get done in that time?
As a classic Type-A personality and chronic over-doer, I used to measure much of my worth by what I could
The imperative of self-advocacy
Living with chronic pain is exhausting enough, but dealing with people who minimize us, and our experience, is no less exhausting and irritating. It gets so old. The energy it takes to constantly encounter such limited understanding and entitlement from people
The Wordwise project quarterly update
The Origins of The WordWise Project
The impetus for The WordWise Project arose from what I perceived as a gap in helpful resources for individuals living with chronic pain, particularly everyday practical as well as mindfulness-based strategies that could help them adapt to their new reality in positive, uplifting, and empowering ways. I also noticed a glaring absence of resources